If there’s one thing I’ve noticed about political elections in the past few cycles, it’s that it has all become so reckless and divisive that it is brainwashing people and making them crazy. Over the past several years, I have watched more and more of my friends and relatives become completely different, unrecognizable people after succumbing to carefully edited and controlled media sound bytes.
It brings to mind an article I once read about a woman whose father went crazy after he began regularly watching Fox News. She wrote that he went from being a happy, friendly, laid-back, agreeable guy to an angry, resentful, reactive, violent-tempered person after he became brainwashed by politically biased media like Fox News. And sadly, I have witnessed the same thing happen to many of my own friends and even my own father.
Just today, a longtime friend of mine from my childhood school days completely lost her shit and went batshit crazy on me after she saw a link I had posted on my Facebook wall about another one of Donald Trump’s creepy sexual comments about his own daughters. We have always gotten along very well over the years despite having completely opposite lives, but lately I had noticed that she had begun to be very snippy with me whenever I would voice my dislike of Trump. Even when I would post actual videos of him where she could see and hear him clearly saying these disgusting things for herself, she still refused to acknowledge it and would try to gloss over it or change the subject or twist it into something else.
Earlier today I posted a link to old video footage of Trump talking to Robin Leach about how big he thought his then infant daughter Tiffany’s breasts might someday get when she grew up. (Insert gag reflex here). I posted a link to the story about it, which included the video footage, and I included my own caption that read “Is Donald Trump really a misogynistic pervert who has zero respect for women? Nah…I’m sure every father looks at his newborn baby daughter and says, ‘Man, I hope my little girl will have a great set of tits someday!” My caption remark wasn’t any snarkier than my usual sarcastic dry wit that everyone around me is used to hearing on a daily basis from me. It’s just how I am. And then I received this reply on my post from my (now former) friend Juanita. (Yes, I’m going to use her name in this post because I’m too lazy to type out “my former friend” every time I reference her in this post. Plus, if you’re going to act like a ridiculous head case over something as petty as a political post on someone else’s Facebook wall, then you deserve to be outed anyway.):
“Did you even watch the video before typing this? He didn’t even say breasts or tits. He just said he thinks she has her moms legs and they aren’t sure if she has these yet. Everyone laughed. It was a joke mainly pointing out his wife’s assets. You know by adding your own spin to things you make yourself look like a man hating bigot. You do this frequently. I am sorry for being rude, but you keep doing this and then wonder why people get angry with you. You are just like that preacher man you spew so much hatred about. You try to tell us and make us believe your own fucked up garbage. You know why you aren’t able to keep a man. Because you are a control freak and you refuse to compromise. I have a cousin just like you. She is beautiful, smart and she is very successful. But after a few months of her selfish ways and refusal to compromise, they all walk away. Life is not all about you and your screwy agenda. And quite frankly it is way too short to deal with someone like you. I really hope you open your eyes and knock off all your bullshit. I used to like how strong you were and independent. But you are none of these things, you are still on the outside looking in at people that you wish you could be like. You whine about everything. You practically whined and cried about leaving your cats behind, you chose to do this so you could live in Florida. We all sympathized. Then after you get one back, shortly after you make a post complaining about how she is needy. I think you need meds. Seriously!“
First off, the fact alone that she just brushed off and condoned his sexualized remark about his infant daughter’s legs and future breasts as “just a joke” makes me seriously want to vomit. If a man were to say that about her own infant daughters, I wonder if she would be so blasé about it? But this is Donald Trump we’re talking about here, so he can literally say ANYTHING, no matter how disgusting and heinous, and his blind followers will ignore it and excuse it.
After I replied to her comment and politely told her in so many words that she should take her opinion of me, write it down on a piece of paper, fold that piece of paper several times into a tiny little piece, and then insert it deep inside of her rectum, she sent me another rambling message to my private inbox. This time, she claimed that I am “begging for attention” and “trying to make myself into an objectified sex symbol” just because I had my eyebrows tattooed on and because I have posted photos of myself in skimpy swimsuits at the beach. Then out of nowhere she began attacking my pole dancing sport hobby and said “A strong powerful woman is a woman who breastfeeds in public, not performing on a stripper pole to impress people.” Her remarks about my cat and my eyebrows were just so fucking BIZARRE and out of nowhere!! Here is a screen capture of part of our conversation below where she goes back and forth between telling me that she thinks my eyebrows look great and then telling me I chose to sexualize myself by asking the technician to give me eyebrows shaped like Kim Kardashian’s. So having eyebrows shaped like the brows of a female celebrity is the same as trying to turn myself into a sex object?? That’s news to me!!
She even went as far as to lecture me on my swimsuit attire I wear to the beach and warned me, “Don’t get upset when men treat you like a stripper chick on a pole. Because that’s exactly what you look like when you dress the way you do.” Oh really? As if I, a 35-year-old grown adult woman, needs to be told how to dress by someone 1,400 miles away from me whom I haven’t seen in many years. With that kind of misogynistic attitude, she’s just a few steps away from claiming that rape victims are “asking for it” if they don’t dress conservatively enough. And that is utterly DISGUSTING.
Ohhhhh Juanita, you are making this too easy for me. Knowing me as well as you do, you should have known better than to come at me with that kind of crazy talk. You should already know by now how sharp of a mind and a tongue I have, and I’m going to give you a dressing down that will make your little tangent look like a Kindergartener’s. This is going to be fun. 🙂
First, let’s address a few quick points here:
1. Not liking Donald Trump or his disgusting, sexualized comments about women—including his own daughters—makes me a man-hating bigot who needs medication and can’t keep a man? Got it. I’m sure that applies to the MILLIONS of other women who despise Trump, too. (Newsflash: A lot of women who hate Trump are married. So that kind of debunks your theory that women who hate Trump are man-hating bigots who can’t get a man.) I’m actually not at all surprised that a Trump supporter like yourself would choose to immediately jump to those types of gendered insults, since we all know that Trump regards women as nothing more than arm candy/sex toys/servants for men and baby factories. Your insults about how no man wants me sound exactly like something Trump would spout off to a female who opposed or criticized him. And judging from the fact that you’ve been married and divorced so many times that I can’t even keep track of all the different last names you’ve had over the years, I’d say it’s YOU who “can’t keep a man”.
2. Because I missed my cat while she was staying with my family in Illinois for awhile after I moved to Florida, then that somehow means I can’t ever remark when she misbehaves or annoys me or else I’m a “whiny hypocrite”?? Umm…OK, what the everloving fuck is THAT all about?!? That makes absolutely NO sense whatsoever. How many times have I heard you and countless other parents bitch and complain about how bad your bratty kids drive you nuts, and then you turn around and croon about how having kids is the greatest thing ever and that everyone should have them or else they are missing out!?!! If that isn’t the pot calling the kettle black, then I don’t know what is!!! So occasionally complaining about my cat’s annoying behaviors even though I love her is being a “whiny hypocrite”, but you complaining about how much your kids drive you crazy and how giving birth to them has ruined your body while at the same time boasting about how being a parent is the greatest thing in the world is A-OK?? BULLSHIT.
3. You keep calling me a “control freak who won’t compromise and needs medication”, yet here you are completely losing your shit because someone else posted something criticizing Donald Trump on their own Facebook wall, and you can’t handle it. If you can’t handle seeing other people not like your chosen political candidate without going on a rant and insulting everything about them, then clearly YOU are the control freak who needs medication.
4. There is really nothing strong or powerful about whipping out a boob and breastfeeding in public. It’s actually a pretty normal, common thing that women have been doing for over a million years. There’s really nothing special or extraordinary about it; it’s just nature. But competitive pole dancing DOES require A LOT of strength and power, and has nothing at all to do with “acting like a stripper”. I guess you’ve never heard of Maria Chavez, who is a certified pole dancing instructor and the 2014 Ecuadorian National Pole Dance Champion. Or Greta Pontarelli, who is the World Pole Sport Champion and is 63 years old. Does anything about either of these women—excuse me, I mean PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES—look like they are “playing around like strippers” or “trying to impress people and beg for attention”? NO. These women are the very definition of strong and powerful. Very few people in the world can perform the physical feats that these women can, including most men. Yes, there are women who work as strippers and dance half naked on a pole for money, but what they do is nothing at all like what the women who pole dance as a professional sport do. There is a world of difference. Being a professional pole dancer does not equal being a stripper. And of course I’m not at all surprised that it’s only the hicks from the rural Midwest who can’t seem to understand this and quickly jump to judge and criticize women who do professional pole dancing as a competitive sport while fully clothed. But that’s ignorance for you. So you can go on telling everyone that squeezing out a bunch of kids and squeezing milk out of your boobs in public makes you “strong and powerful”, but I’d say my opinion about what makes women strong and powerful differs greatly from yours.
5. Let’s get something straight here: I am a fucking ADULT, and it will be a cold day in Hell before I let ANYONE…especially any hillbillies from 1,300 miles away whom I haven’t even seen in many years…tell me how I can and can’t dress. I will wear whatever I goddamn well please, and I will do whatever I goddamn well please because I CAN!!! And I’m getting really sick and tired of this outdated sexist bullshit that a woman’s character as a person is defined by her clothing choices and that showing even the tiniest bit of skin means she is “asking for” attention…..especially unwanted attention. I have a WIDE array of clothing in my closet ranging from business suits to thong swimsuits. Whether I wear a business suit covering my entire body one day or a thong swimsuit to the beach the next day, it has NO effect on my character as a person. I’m still the same person inside and out whether I am wearing sweatpants or a bikini. And you can try to insist as much as you wish that I dress and look a certain way just to get attention, but I can assure you I DON’T. I do it for ME because I want to look good just for the sake of looking good. Just because there are other women like yourself who try to look nice just for male attention doesn’t mean that ALL women do, so stop projecting your own crap onto us. In fact, I DON’T WANT the attention of most men I come across. When I’m at the beach, I simply want to swim and suntan in peace and quiet without some sleazebucket trying to get all up in my personal space just because I’m showing some skin. I’m there to enjoy MYSELF, and I don’t hesitate to deal with any creepy men who feel that they are entitled to come into my personal space without my permission. I won’t alter my clothing or my activities in order to avoid them, I just simply put them in their place when they cross the line. And as an added note, if you’re going to judge and lecture women for daring to wear whatever makes them feel comfortable and sexy, then YOU shouldn’t be posting topless (or nude?) photos of yourself trying to look sexy on Facebook. It just makes you a fucking HYPOCRITE.
6. I had my eyebrows tattooed to make them look just like Kim Kardashian’s brows for “added sexiness”. Oooooohhh, you got me there!! Shame on me for trying to sexualize myself by wanting eyebrows shaped like a reality star’s!! Actually fuck you, my reasons for having my eyebrows done had nothing at all to do with “wanting to be sexy”. I lost ALL of my eyebrows when I was 19 and they never grew back. I had to spend the next ten years drawing them on every day with a pencil, and I got sick of it. So I decided to get them cosmetically tattooed on so that I could always have eyebrows without having to create them myself every damn day. I wanted full and shapely brows, and Kim Kardashian’s brows were a good example to give to my technician. Seriously, we’re talking about fucking EYEBROWS here. You’re accusing me of trying to make myself into a sex object and attract attention from men with my EYEBROWS??? Go fuck yourself.
7. If you want to talk about people who constantly look for attention, then look no further than yourself and other parents like you. Parents, or “breeders” as many people in the Childfree community call them, are the biggest attention whores there are!! They’re relentlessly shoving pictures of their kids in everyone’s faces, clogging up our Facebook newsfeeds with every single detail about their kids’ bowel movements and puke incidents as if anyone would ever WANT to hear about that nasty shit, and going on and on and ON about how having kids is THE best and greatest thing in the world while at the same time demonizing anyone else who dares to let it be known that they don’t like kids and don’t wish to breed any. Here’s a little message to you on behalf of the entire growing childfree community: No one gives a fraction of a shit about your kids as much as you do. We. Do. Not. Care!! Yet we still have to listen to parents endlessly prattle on and on about their kids and watch them compete with each other over whose kids are better and whose lives are happier. It’s ALL an obvious attention grab. So if you’re going to use your breeding as a way to glean attention from people for the rest of your entire lives, then you can fucking deal with me posting a few swimsuit photos on Facebook.
Considering the source, it really doesn’t surprise me at all that she would say garbage like this. This is coming from someone who is a rural Midwest hillbilly redneck who married right out of high school and spit out a bunch of kids and has never had a real career or an education other than high school. Her entire life has always revolved around sitting at home taking care of kids and livestock, and she can’t comprehend that there are other women out in the world who have vastly different lives with no desire to live like she does. So it’s no surprise to me that she likes Donald Trump, either. This is exactly the kind of people his crass rhetoric appeals to. Whenever other women have criticized me for “not having a man”, I have found that it NEVER comes from women who are secure with themselves and have careers and full lives. It ALWAYS comes from the women who are insecure, can’t stand on their own two feet, and have always had a man at their side because they are so desperate to be with someone that they will take any worthless idiot who comes along. It’s not a coincidence, either. Sure, it’s easy to always “have a man who loves you” when you will take the first piece of shit who comes along no matter how low quality he is or how badly he treats you. I’ve always noticed that the men these type of women brag about having are always the type of men I wouldn’t want to touch with a ten foot pole. They always look gross and scuzzy and have about as much worth as a nickel. And judging from how many times these types of women have been divorced and re-married, it looks to me like they don’t have much luck with “keeping a man”, either.
Contrary to what people like Juanita might think, I actually have no trouble at all getting and keeping a man…..as long as he meets my basic standards and treats me right. I go out on dates all the time, and I constantly have men asking me out and trying to get my attention. But for every man I agree to go out with, there are at least ten others who I reject. And that’s because they don’t come anywhere close to meeting my basic standards.
I don’t ask a lot of the men I choose to date. My only requirements of the men I date are that they have some type of higher education from college or a trade school, they have a steady job, they have their own place to live and their own car, they have a plan for what they want to do with their life and some goals, and that they don’t use drugs or have a criminal record. I’m not looking for a perfect looking six foot tall millionaire, I just like men who have their shit together and won’t lean on me to support them and won’t drag me into any kind of trouble that they might be into.
I have gone out on MANY dates with men. And some of those dates have turned into dating relationships. But unfortunately, many of them turned out to be complete duds. They seemed fine at first, but before long many of them began to try to control me and dictate what I wore, how I wore my hair and make-up, who I could and could not talk to, etc. In fact, just recently I went out with a guy who continuously criticized my hair color and the amount of makeup I wore. And then when I let him know that his constant criticism bothered me, he stubbornly refused to apologize or acknowledge my feelings and kept telling me that I was “taking it too personally”. So if you want to talk about “control freaks”, Juanita, then you should go talk to THOSE guys. And when a lot of these men aren’t acting like control freaks, they are hiding girlfriends, wives, and other women from me or expecting me to financially support them. And when I sense the slightest whiff that any of the bullshit I just described is happening, I do not hesitate to drop these men like a hot potato and cease any further contact or interaction with them. And that’s because, despite the fact that women like yourself think that any woman who is single and doesn’t always have a man at her side is somehow defective and unable to keep one, the truth is that I would rather be single and “lonely” any day than be miserable in the company of a man who is trying to control me, abuse me, lie to me, or take advantage of me. Maybe you and other women like you are so desperate that you don’t have any standards, but I sure as Hell do. And choosing to be by myself instead of settling for someone who is no good and treats me like shit is definitely the sign of a “strong and powerful” woman. Of course, women like yourself would just respond to that by telling me, “Well you obviously don’t know how to pick good men, because I have a good man.” Well whoopdie-do, good for you!! But again, it’s not hard to find a man who is desperate for companionship when you’re equally desperate and willing to take the first willing schlub that comes along. And from what I have heard a lot of women like yourself occasionally admit, it seems that these “good men” aren’t always that good to you behind closed doors.
And for the record, I still have a few former flames from years ago who haven’t forgotten about me. I just took a trip to Colorado with a former dating partner of mine. We dated six years ago and have remained very close friends despite our lives taking us in different geographical directions. If we didn’t live 1,600 miles away from each other, I’m sure we would probably be dating again. (Oh and by the way, when I showed him your dumbass rant, his response was “Fuck her!! She hates you cuz she ain’t you!!” So yeah, there’s that. LOL) And then there’s another old dating flame of mine from ten years ago who is now married with kids. We have kept in close contact all throughout the last ten years, and he often tells me he still thinks about me and misses me and that he sometimes thinks he made a huge mistake when we broke up. So it would appear to me that I have no problem whatsoever with “keeping a man” if I have men from years ago telling me that they still think about me and wish we were together again.
To be honest, I don’t think it’s really just my dislike of Trump that brought on this sudden batshit crazy rant from Juanita, even though she’s been acting like kind of a cunt to me ever since I began expressing my dislike for Trump on Facebook. I think it goes a little deeper than that, and it is something I have seen and encountered countless other times from other women who are a lot like her. I think it has less to do with our political differences and more to do with the fact that there is some unspoken resentmen within them due to the fact that I did not succumb to the same monotonous lifestyle that they all did. NONE of the women who have given me this kind of antiquated bullshit about not having a man and a litter of kids have ever gone to college, had a career of their own, or lived an independent life on their own without a man in the picture. They think that their lives are how every other woman’s lives should be, and they get offended and reactive when other women express that they don’t want to live that kind of life. Either they can’t comprehend that it is perfectly normal anymore for women to not have to have a man and kids, or they do know this and are a little bitter about the fact that some other women made different choices than they did. You can’t tell me that these frazzled housewives with a gaggle of kids and a husband who struggles to support them aren’t a little butthurt and envious when they see other women who are single and childless and living it up traveling and spending their money on themselves while they are stuck at home cleaning up shit and puke every day.
I had another former friend who I cut out of my life over a year ago because she began acting like a total psycho bitch to me after the birth of her third kid who turned out to be severely disabled for life. She was miserable and stressed out, and she resented me for not having to go through the daily struggles that she was going through. And just like all the others, she had been a mother since she was very young and had multiple kids from different husbands and baby-daddies. There’s definitely a trend here. That’s why they always immediately go for the “I have a man and you don’t!!” insults, because it’s all they’ve got to work with. Women like Juanita are so conditioned to use the single status of other women as a weapon that when my friend Kat replied to Juanita’s comment and defended me, Juanita automatically spat back at Kat that she was “lonely”, too….but the joke was on her, because Kat has been married for a long time!! LOL! Unfortunately for women like that, they don’t understand that jabs like that aren’t insults to women like me because we can see right through it. Smart women like me KNOW that they only throw out bullshit like that because they are insecure and could never survive without a man, and so therefore they assume that every other woman must feel the same way.
And I soberly stated before, this current election cycle seems to be bringing out the ugliest side of so many people on a scale never seen before in this lifetime. I’m old enough to have lived through a few Presidential elections before, and never before in my life have I seen such heated, violent UGLINESS radiating from so many people because of Donald Trump. I saw a good deal of this back when George W. Bush was running for his second term in office, but even what I saw then pales in comparison to what I am seeing now. It sickens me to see so many White Supremacists, racists, and misogynists coming out of the woodwork and proudly shouting out their hate for the entire world to see with Trump’s approval. And it sickens me even more to see some of my own friends and family succumb to it as well. I don’t even know who some of them are anymore. My now former friend Juanita never talked or acted in this way towards me until I began speaking against Donald Trump. Right now this country is every bit as divided as it was right before the Civil War. And I cringe to think how much uglier things could possibly get up until the election.
So yeah, I’m not at all hurt or upset that Juanita unfriended me and then blocked me on Facebook after her nasty, ignorant, unwarranted temper tantrum on my Facebook wall. A lot of times I have to unfriend people myself when I realize that they are assholes, but in this case the trash took itself out. I definitely don’t need people like that in my life who are harboring some kind of resentment towards me and what I do. And I definitely don’t need relationship advice or criticisms from redneck women who got married right out of high school, have had more than one failed marriage, and haven’t done anything with their lives except breed kids. Thanks but no thanks, I’ll take it from here and continue doing my thing by “dressing like a stripper” and “begging for attention” and lamenting the fact that I wasn’t married and saddled with three or four kids by the age of 28. Bye, Felicia!!! 🙂